Ugh...

Dontcha just hate days where you wake up in the morning and know it's not going to be a good day? It makes me want to go back to bed and not come out until like... 530 tonight. Wake up feeling sick, STILL feeling a little sick 2 hours later, and just hoping it's nothing serious. Probably just something I ate a couple days ago... if it's not better by tonight, I'm going to the doc.

But I'm glad Dad finally clicked it. We were praying for you guys the other night, and I remember saying, "God, they promised each other forever, and 22 years isn't forever!" I felt like a 3 year old... "but you PROMISED!!" Remember that "letter from God" prayer thing you told me about a few years ago? I haven't done that for a while, but I did it the other night, and one of the things God showed me is that I've been shutting Him out alot lately... just like Dad. And that I need to take the first step, regardless of how scary it is. How does it go... Faith is stepping off the edge of everything you've ever known, into the darkness, knowing that there will be a ledge to stand on or you will be taught to fly? I need to do that... step out in faith, and let God catch me. I've realized that these past couple nights as Chris and I make a point of praying together.

He surprised me, and made me ashamed of myself the other day. He asked me how come I never pray anymore, why don't I read my Bible or anything anymore? He said, "That was one of the first things I liked about you, that you prayed out loud. You don't do that anymore." ZING... score one for God, through Chris. So then of course, what do I do? Stay up until 2 am reading my Bible, going over some old studies. I need to find a new one... and not a once a week one either, b/c I'll forget or procrastinate, or just not do it. Off to look for one right now!